Addicted by nataliej from Flickr

It’s been four months since I moved back to Toronto for work after a four-month stint living at my dad’s after graduating university and breaking up with a boyfriend.

Until four months ago, I’d had Internet access wherever I was living nearly continuously for over 10 years, maybe more. I feel like I’ve had the Internet for my entire life (or at least the half that I actually remember) and it’s been an important tool throughout my life.

If I hadn’t been so involved online over the last 10 years, I highly doubt I would be capable enough to do my current job.

But over the last year, I noticed the Internet becoming an addiction and a crutch.

I love consuming information and I could probably spend every waking hour of my life reading blogs, watching videos, listening to podcasts, checking out photos, etc. I know this is a good thing, but it’s also a dangerous thing if anyone actually does it because then you stop participating in all the other really great things about life.

And as my last year of university came to a close, and simultaneously so did my last relationship, I found comfort in focusing my attention on the computer because it meant I didn’t have to think about all the crappy stuff going on in my life at the time. It was a distraction and it became an instant wall between my ex-boyfriend and I when we lived together.

I didn’t want to talk, fight, clean up after him, open the mail, cook or do anything else that was an extension of our relationship. I wanted to ignore it all, so I did.

When I arrived at my dad’s last April, I didn’t really like anything about my life there either – I had grown distant from my family after four years away from school, my dad’s girlfriend had moved in, there was nothing to do in that town and none of my friends were there anymore – so, once again, I ignored all that in favour of the Internet. I sometimes worked all day and night. I read dozens of blog articles every day. I watched hours of TV online. Sure, I got out now and then, but not enough.

So, I finally realized that I had left one unhealthy situation for another and I needed to get out. Financially, I probably wasn’t ready, but I knew I could get by, so I moved to Toronto Sept. 1.

Four months later, I still don’t have Internet access at my apartment. I’ve found many reasons to justify it – Canadian telecom providers suck, I’m on the Internet at work anyway, I don’t want to be stuck on a computer all night after I’ve been sitting at one all day, etc. – but it’s starting to creep up on me. Sure, I have email and Internet access on my BlackBerry, but it’s not the same.

Sometimes I don’t leave work until 7 or 8 p.m. because there are things I still want to do. I’ve marked as read countless undoubtedly interesting blog articles in my Google Reader because I can’t spend my workdays catching up. I mostly forget about Twitter and Facebook in the evenings and on weekends. Until recently when I finally got a TV again, I’d mostly replaced TV shows and movies with podcasts I download at work and listen to at home.

The truth is, this extreme hasn’t felt right either, so now I’m itching to connect again, but I’m kind of scared at the same time. What if there is only one extreme or the other for me? Only being connected all the time or not being connected?

How do you balance staying involved online with staying involved in the rest of life?

P.S. Any testimonials for an excellent Internet service provider in Toronto that isn’t Bell or Rogers?

These articles paint twentysomething students and recent grads, and even unemployed workers in their mid-to-late 30s, as idealistic slackers without a care in the world who – for a time – surf couches, take odd jobs and, God forbid, actually feel optimistic about the future while they’re doing it.

Indeed, the trend is spurred on by changing attitudes towards work, says Karyn Gordon, a workplace and youth consultant. Young people today are less likely to see work as their raison d’être. They are happier to stay jobless because they don’t base their self worth on their job, Dr. Gordon says. [The Globe and Mail]

While this is generally true, many of us still long for a life-long career we are happy in. Unlike our parents’ and grandparents’ generations, who often stayed at one job or only a couple similar jobs their whole lives, perhaps it’s not the individual jobs that make up an important part of who we are. After all, we’re likely to change jobs at least a dozen or so times in our lifetime. But I think a meaningful career that progresses steadily from Point A to B to C, etc. is still important to Gen Y. We want to know our dedication and hard work is paying off in the long run.

Although I usually favour the Globe over other Canadian publications, its article on this topic doesn’t hold up to the paper’s normally high standards. It focuses on Gen Y’s stereotypical Peter Pan-ishness (however, most of the sources in this article are in their 30s for some reason) and doesn’t acknowledge the fact that young people currently have a lot of competition for jobs due to the recession, and there is also currently more reliance on short-term contract work which might leave people unemployed, then employed and then un/underemployed again.

Now, aside from the fact that I know more people who are working hard (or at least working hard at trying to get a job so they can work hard) than not, in previous generations the “funemployed” were simply free spirits who needed a little extra time to “find themselves.” Weren’t they? I don’t think this is something new nor do I think the funemployed should define our entire generation.

In the more recent Maclean’s article on the same topic, I think the reality of Gen Y not being able to find meaningful work and pursuing other valid options is more accurately represented. For example:

• realizing it’s a tough time to look for a career-advancing job and working a service job to finance a vacation before taking international internships abroad;
• getting laid off and living on the severance package while keeping an ear to the ground until another meaningful opportunity presents itself;
• working on hobbies and projects that make you happy, such as art, music or blogging, which can also help with networking and preventing the isolation that typically occurs when someone is unemployed.

Although the article is still peppered with a few Gen Y stereotypes, it’s much more kind than the other. And as for our generation being more accepted of unemployment than previous generations, let’s just say we realize there are different paths we can take along the journey toward a fulfilling career. Sometimes it includes travel (for business or for pleasure), or exploring different interests, or just being unemployed for a while because it can be tough to find a job.

And it’s OK!

(However, I have to mention that I think time off should include something that is potentially relevant to your career path, such as volunteering/unpaid internships or creating work for yourself through some sort of project or even just a blog.)

I woke up late. Left the apartment late. OK, that’s not so stange, but I forgot my glasses and didn’t realize until I was already on the subway.

I was sitting across from a well-dressed, well-groomed man probably in his late 20s or early 30s. He looked professional, wearing a pea coat, dress pants and black leather dress shoes.

But he was laughing. He was alone, reading Metro and laughing hysterically. It started under his breath, then it grew into quiet snickers and then he was full-out laughing at whatever he was reading. I didn’t grab a copy of Metro today, but I can’t imagine what was so funny.

The weirdest thing was nobody else seemed to notice he was laughing. I found it hard to keep a straight face while watching him, yet no one else was even looking his way.

Then I got on the bus. I sat facing the back doors, which were open. Then this three-legged dog hops toward the bus and gets on ahead of her owner, who’s a young woman about the same age as me.

How often do you see a three-legged dog?

And then Clare and I went to the bank at lunch to pull out some cash for food, and there was a creepy doll sitting in the window which had either been left behind by a child or, judging by the water trapped inside her plastic body, found in a snowbank which had recently melted.

She was almost like a Barbie, but she was South Asian, wore a blue sari and definitely didn’t share Barbie’s horrifying body shape.

Almost out of instinct I picked it up and looked at her more closely (maybe because I wasn’t wearing my glasses).

I feel like somehow all of these things are tied together, but that it’s going to take me weeks or even months to figure out what it all means.

Probably not, but that’s how it happens in the movies anyway.